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A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.She replied in a huff,huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"'

A blonde with two red ears went to her doctor. The doctor asked her what had happened to her ears. She answered,  "I was ironing a shirt and the phone rang, but instead of picking up the phone, I accidentally  picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear."  "Oh dear!" the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. "But  what happened to the other ear?"  "The son of a gun called back!"